Kim Wetter

Love: A Rant and Some Musings

I’ve been called a romantic. I have lofty ideas about true love, love at first sight and the beauty of love in general. It’s something I believe in with all my being.

However, sometimes I look at the world and it’s so difficult to keep my beliefs strong. The world is so full of hatred and sadness and sometimes those dark clouds cast a shadow on all that is good.

I am no exception. In my own life I strive to be honest and kind but even I struggle with a dark side. Which reminds me of a quote from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (the movie): “There can be no light without the dark and so it is with magic. Myself, I always strive to live within the light.” (I cannot escape my own nerdiness in any given situation so don’t ask me to try, even in a topic like this)

And so it is with life – there can be no love without hate.

I struggle most when it comes to people who love one another hurting each other. I, myself, have hurt people I cared about deeply. Even with my own actions, I’m baffled by what I was thinking at the time. A lot of these situations come from a place of anger or fear and we make drastic decisions in order to feel as if we’ve regained control. I’ve always believed that anger was a secondary emotion. Anger is an emotion where we feel more in control. Being angry at someone is a lot easier than admitting they have hurt you. Being angry is way easier than admitting you’re in the wrong. It’s not a purposeful emotion but we’re not always in control of our stubborn emotions anyways.

I’ve been in love and I’ve had my heart ripped out and stomped on. A good friend of mine, who has always been on the opposite side of my “True Love” argument (she doesn’t think it exists), sat me down one day after my heartache and started to carefully examine my current thoughts on love. She started by telling me that the next girl I date should not be crazy, then amended the statement to say that all girls are crazy so I should shoot for a girl that’s nice. The conversation developed from that point onto whether or not I thought the feelings in my previous relationship had been real.

To me, of course it was real. The love I felt was real. Obviously she was not “the one” for me in that sense but I believe still in the connection we had, as messed up as that might be. And that led me to talk about when or if I’d ever find a connection like that again. My friend was slow and cautious at this point because I was still heartbroken and asked me if I felt it was possible.

That’s when things took a turn: I suddenly sat up straight and said “Yes!” Emphatically, yes. I totally and completely believe in the love I sought before. True love was not a far distant thought, even then. It’s something pure and real and out there.

She actually sighed with relief. She was so worried that my spirit and beliefs had been broken or wounded after what had happened. But they aren’t. They’re intact and I still have that hope.

The truth is that the world will beat us down. People will let you down. Heartache and pain and anger and hate will always exist. But, myself, I always strive to live within the light. Our world would be a much better place if more people did the same.